Savor the seconds

Never thought I'd be so happy to be in Mesquite, Tx. I am so thankful to be surrounded by family and friends while Ryan deploys for the first time. I dreaded the car ride here, especially with a toddler, but luckily the second day was not as bad as the first. Also I took a few pictures that I love.
This one was in the morning in South Dakota. I can't remember ever witnessing the sunrise. It was mesmerizing.

The sun wanted to creep up.

I looked back at one moment and realized as we were waiting for the sunrise, the moon was still behind us wrapped up in the colorful clouds. 

 The sun rise was so beautiful. A memory I will hold onto for a long time. The three of us witnessing something so mundane, yet miraculous.

I was so excited to finally see the dried up Red River!

Donnie so enjoyed getting out of the car and being able to run around and play.

As much as I had dreaded the long drive we made a lot of great memories on the road. As we settle into Texas I am dreading this week to come to an end. Thursday. I hate Thursday. But enough about the sad stuff. I am so excited for today! Today Ryan and I get to go out on a dinner and a movie date! We haven't been on one in more than 7 months! I am also really excited to finally see Mocking Jay, but its a huge plus that I get to take a hot date with me! With only a few days left with Ryan 

in person I am just going take each day slowly and try to savor every second.

Get to it

The time is nearing to leave our first home outside of Texas. I knew this day would come, but honestly I did not think it would come so soon. One minute I am so excited and the next extremely sad. I am so thankful for the internet because that is how I met a great friend before we came to South Dakota and she then introduced me to a great group of women. I love knowing I will still have friends when I come back to South Dakota. Six Months is not that long, but it still is not fun to think about. I do not think there is a job Ryan could have had that would allow me to stay home with our son. I am ever so grateful for that. I honestly did not even imagine this lifestyle. I know there are so many things I still don't know, but I am learning everyday. Especially about OPSEC. Basically keep your mouth shut. I can't say where Ryan is going or when he leaves and I get it, but, but well nothing. We have been apart before not too long ago and had very little contact so I am trying to remember that to help me get through this. I know I am not the only one going through this, but it still sucks. That's really the only way I can describe it. In all reality Ryan promised to serve this country and he is upholding that promise and I could not be more proud of him. My son has a great role model. And I have an amazing husband. 

I think the one thing that's not helping at all is packing. Packing up a small item that holds so many memories. Whether its a box holding 10 year old love notes, a CD that was gifted to me because Ryan was heading in the right direction 10 years ago, Donnie's hospital tag, an engraved mug, I mean the list goes on and on. A lifetime worth of memories that I honestly haven't given a thought to in months and months are so now precious again. I think this move is not only resurfacing memories for me but for Ryan too. I won't go any further than that, but my heart aches for him. He is always keeping me together emotionally. He is always the voice of reason, calmness, and assurance. I owe it to him to be the same when he needs it. As much as I want to cry all day everyday, I know that he needs me to be strong. And I am in no way doing it alone. I am so thankful for family and friends for their encouragement. Also there is a sweet, smart, little rascal that keeps me going as well. 

As much as I've delayed getting back to packing, I must get to it. 

“We must learn how to explode! Any disease is healthier than the one provoked by a hoarded rage.” 
― Emil Cioran